The divorce process can seem messy and complicated, but it doesn’t have to be. Remember: Your attitude will almost always determine your spouse’s attitude. If you are quiet, calm, and collected during all proceedings, they are more likely to not raise disputes or disagreements, either. It’s all a matter of perspective, and you need to always keep a healthy, balanced perspective on all matters in your filing, petition, and going to court (if necessary). What should you do first?
- First, Go To an Attorney
A divorce attorney can clarify a situation in a very simple manner, particularly regarding your specific personal finances, your children, both partners’ careers, and the living arrangements. Go to a divorce attorney Salt Lake City UT for lots of help in organizing and proceeding with your divorce in a quick, efficient fashion.
A divorce attorney can also help you figure out an equitable division of your assets, both with or without a prenuptial agreement in play. They can help you file documents with the court and can make sure everything is exactly legal and in order before you do so.
Ask your attorney whether going to court is even necessary in your case. It may not be. In fact, many partners who are parting amicably can discuss low-key ways of getting their divorce finalized without messy court proceedings.
- Second, Talk to Your Spouse
Establish a strong, understanding, line of communication with your spouse. Make sure that you never scream or yell at them and that both of you walk outside for a few minutes as soon as this starts to occur. Obviously, emotions will run high at this point and decisions made during this time will lead to losses on both sides. Protect everyone’s assets by agreeing to take a few minutes to break from each other (preferably outdoors, which is much more calming and relaxing) when this occurs.
When the two of you get into a line of communication which is simple and understandable, talk about your feelings first. Don’t save this for after all of the property and children have been divided up between you or after some time has passed. First, discuss your feelings at that moment. Also, as your feelings fluctuate, make sure you keep your partner apprised of your progress, whether or not they share theirs with you, too.
This constant update on your feelings will give them a very good feel for where exactly you stand at any point in time and how both of you might proceed on the current step and the next step.
- Third, File the Petition for Divorce
It’s pretty important that you only file a petition for divorce with the court after you have spoken with your divorce attorney and after you have spoken with your spouse several times. This is because the type of petition you file may depend on what you and your spouse have mutually decided between the two of you.
There must be grounds for divorce and there are both “fault” and “no-fault” options available. Ask your divorce attorney about “no-fault” petitions and see if your state supports these types of divorces filed with the court. If so and if you can come to some sort of agreement with your spouse, you don’t have to have a long, messy legal battle with them. You can simply ask your attorney to help you with the papers and all parties can sit down together and make sure the details are organized correctly.
- Fourth, Divide Your Assets Fairly
Your ex can bring you back to court to re-hash details if you hide assets, such as money, art, valuables, etc. So, be sure to make these subjects part of your pre-divorce personal talks with your spouse. Your marriage may be dead, but it can be a bloodless battle.
Remember in all things: divorce often reflects how well people can handle massive social, emotional and financial change. Keep your cool, deal fairly with the attorney of your spouse and your divorce attorney, and all will be well in the end.