In a difficult divorce proceeding, you are as responsible for your children as you are to yourself,
if not more so. Divorces are usually as quick and painless as the asset division is. No assets to divide, you’re ‘lucky,’ if that is the correct term. No asset division means that you get to the business of separating yourselves emotionally and physically and simply just stop contact.

Unfortunately, it’s rarely as simple as this. As soon as a marriage happens you are bound together in tax and most likely in financial accounts. However, one of the most valuable ‘assets’ of any marriage, one of the most important and emotionally careful proceedings you need to navigate around, is how to approach the topic of your children, and more importantly, custody.

This is where the bloodiest battles in the divorce courtroom occur. Unfortunately, but understandably so, discussions around who should take the sole main parental guidance of the children is usually a role that both parents want to fill with a vehement passion. If this is you, you are likely aware of the emotional turbulence that you go through during this stage of the settlements.

There are methods you can use to improve your case to the judge though. There’s a faulty perception that ‘women are the main ones to win’ in these cases, and while more mothers are afforded the care rights of their children statistically, a good judge will allow either side to express their case and poot their best foot forward regarding this issue.

Here are a few tips to help strengthen your case.

Provide References

In order to have your good character confirmed, consider bringing in impartial people from your life to the proceedings to testify in your name. This might be a boss, a landlord, or someone similar who can confirm that you run a stable, secure and calm household.

This will work most effectively if this is someone who has authority to you, has known you a fair amount of time and someone who is willing to testify impartially.

Provide Documentation

Rationally and clearly provide your case to the judge. Provide all documents that you need to show that your household is reliable. This can include payslips, tax returns, bank statements and even supplementary material about why the divorce happened and how you tried to come through it well. This is why it’s so important to act professionally during a divorce because anything you said or did that you might regret out of pure emotion will come back to bite you here. Children are never given to people who seem overly emotional or unstable during this process, so don’t provide any reason for something to be held against your legally.

Use Professional Legal Services

Using additional legal counseling solutions through a service like such as videography, court reporting or interpreters can help you additionally arm yourself with a legal team and service that can help you both present your case well to the judge. For example, showing the judge how you have progressed during the entire trialing process or even simply consulting lawyers can make you seem professional and rational – two qualities judges love to see in those who are hoping to keep their children.

Remember, be sure to compromise. Its likely that unless your ex-partner does everything to discredit themselves, you will have to come to some form of arrangement for equal access. If you are not awarded custody, be happy with visitation or weekly temporal custody. Do what you can to make this situation better for everyone involved. You will be better off for it.