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‘True friendship’ Between a Girl and a Boy…Does It Actually Exist?

Friendship to me is an unconditional bond between two or many people. It does not require any compulsory commitment in return from the one who are our best friends. In friendship, we love to spend time with one another and share everything we can. We develop intriguing feelings amongst ourselves which we love to cherish and do not let it go down. A friend finds an aide and confidant in a person whom he calls his best buddy. He feels very relaxed and secure to part with all his secrets, his personal and social feelings, emotions, commitment, and so on.

However, he or she might have some inhibition to disclose certain things with those of opposite sex. Now a question arises. Can two people of the opposite gender become best of buddies? Maybe they can or maybe they cannot. Why can’t they be, to which we call, the ‘best pals’? According to me, a guy and a gal can never the best friends. Why….? Let me explain. I may be wrong but this is just my point of view. I am open to all kinds of comments regarding this.

To me, a friend is a person whom we share almost everything, isn’t he? A male person can never be comfortable to share something with his female counterpart and the vice versa. A boy’s secrets are not to be talked about with a girl (unless she is his wife or girlfriend).

He may like that girl, can have a soft corner for her, but not surely his confidante. His masculine nature will prevent him from doing so. He will of course be friendly but cannot be intimate with her staying in friendship. He will have a sympathetic attitude for her. He tends to become a chauvinist and a little bit of possessive about her. He thinks that being a man he needs to lead from the front and show her way. Hence, an imbalance prevails in the friendship from the beginning. The girl also tends to like the companionship and the supremacy of him. This eventually escalates to love. The friendship takes a back seat and love blooms. They retain the friendship but love always comes first before them which usually end up with sex.

On the other hand, same sex friendship stays as a friendship for a long time, sometimes forever. It is much more independent and transparent. A boy can sleep with a boy at night for the sake of sleep only, but if a boy tries to sleep with a girl, many thoughts occur to both of them. Eventually, it may be just a good sleep or an escalation of their feelings, which is very much natural in a sense. Sex compulsorily comes in between two good friends belonging to opposite genders.

Moreover, they cannot remain as best friends for a long time as their respective spouses (which they will have in the future) need more attention than their friendship. After marriage, they become apart on the physical and the emotional parts. Friendship does not finish but the commitment for the friendship dies. Even if both of them get married to each other, their friendship gets a raise and perches on something higher than just a good friendship.

Therefore, what we mean by ‘best friends’ does not stay longer amidst a boy and a girl bt between a boy and a boy or between a girl and a girl. The pure and unconditional love of a friendship blossoms only between two people of the same sex and it stays as a friendship for the rest of the life.

  • Jayaditya

    Nice post…many things to learn…I 100% agree with you…Keep postin’….wanna read more…good luck!!!

    • Kalyan

      Thanks Jayaditya for your comments.. yes, I strongly believe that there is no such long run true friendship between people of opposite sex.but there are of course exceptions to it.

      yes, you will see more such thing.. keep coming to the blog and participate in the discussion.

  • Ankita Neogi

    Well I disagree to many things written in this post. Wouldn’t have disagreed, may be, if I hadn’t got a friend like you! Anyway, friendship between anyone, between 2 girls or between a girl and a boy doesn’t always mean sharing secrets. Yes this is true that a boy can’t share his secrets with his friend(who’s a girl) until she is his GF or wife..but is friendship all about sharing secrets? I guess no, there are many more things to share with your friend. I have had 2 or 3 friends who are very close to me but there hasn’t bloomed any kind of amorous feelings between us. Again love is a relative term, there is love between 2 friends (a boy and a girl) but it differs from the feeling that a boyfriend has for his girlfriend. And truly speaking KD, friendship with you has also made me feel against the content of this post. I guess you too may feel the same when it comes to our friendship. We like each other as friends, enjoy each others company, fight with each other, resolve all fights and also miss each other when we haven’t spoken for a long time. This is also Love but of a different kind. Though what you say is true but it varies with people. It all depends on how you mix with a person and what you have in mind…Well-written…also true…but not always true….Do correct me if I’m wrong…Waiting for your reply…

    • Kalyan

      Thank you very much for your reply. Indeed, I agree with you on the points you made. Sharing secrets may be one of the factors which good friends do but maybe it’s not an essential for a long lasting friendship between any people of any sex. Yes, I too have thoroughly enjoyed your friendship and we can say, it’s really a friendly one. Thanks for being my friend.

  • Gopal Deka

    It,s imposible to maintaine a frindship between two boy and girl for long. Before mariage it may stay but after mariage it couldn,t maintain

    • Kalyan

      Absolutely true Gopal. There may be exceptions but it’s generally true all types of relationships.

  • shadyem

    ya dude I agree with u… Bt everything depends upon how we see that. There may exist true friendship between a boy and a girl , but after marriage this relationship gets decayed. Eventhough they maintain their friendship after marriage they cannot be the same as before. Learned something from u thanks dude….

  • Bb

    Hi.ur’s vry nc abt d True Friendship btwn a boy ad girl.except 1thing..
    “True Friendship” between 2opposite gender is mostly turns into ‘Love’…bt their’s love it comes frm thr “Soul” nt frm physicall sight r interest
    So its not… never ever comes under the word (***)..

  • Monu yadav

    No dear m nt cmpltly agree with u….

    • kalyan brata das

      Yeap, there are of course exceptions but this is actually true in the broader sense. “)

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